What are the origins of being a sexpert, pleasure coach and a Certified Authentic Tantra® Practitioner? Where you always sexually liberated?
I began my work in sexuality in 2011 by launching my sex education blog and YouTube channel: Glamerotica101.
While doing research in 2009/2010, I recognized that black people didn’t have a leader or someone to turn to for sexual health education. No one was speaking directly to us or speaking up for us.
So, I decided to get into this work to be that representation to empower black women, initially. Most of my earlier work is female-centric. Now, my work expands to all bodies.
I’ve always spoken to anyone who would listen and feel informed and empowered by what I have to share, no matter the pigment of their skin. And as a black woman I’m also representing for Us. As far as Authentic Tantra® is concerned, I recently graduated from The Institute of Authentic Tantra Education in 2018, and I’m excited to bring the knowledge and my practice out into the world.
How does it feel now that you are sexually liberated?
To be sexually liberated feels free. Knowing that I am in control of my body, my sexual expression, my sexual identity and my sexual exploration is healing and most definitely fun!
Knowing that by living my life freely I’m inspiring others to do the same is an added bonus that affirms my purpose on this Earth: extending Love through action.
What’s one way you’ve been seeking to heal?
I choose to heal my perception daily by dissociating myself with ego thoughts. To heal means “to see correctly” according to the spiritual text, A Course In Miracles, and to see correctly is to see all things and treat all things with LOVE.
Every day my mind is flooded with fearful illusions that the ego projects in order to make itself important. And a lot of these thoughts are supported by programming that I’ve experienced from the world.
Every single day I’m using spiritual tools to remember Love and to live in Love by dispelling lies, dropping negative programming, and choosing for truth, which is Love.
Can sex help us heal? If so, how? And how is a Certified Authentic Tantra Practitioner a part of that?
Sex is Form, meaning it takes on whatever meaning you give it. Sex can be used for healing. Sex can also be used to hurt, separate, abuse, attack and control.
Sex in itself isn’t healing.
It’s the intention of experiencing love and healing through sex that catalyzes purification. Healing sex happens when two people are choosing to drop their programmed perceptions about sex and interact with each other in full, conscious acceptance without guilt or judgement. Even if a person has never practiced, Authentic Tantra®, a person changing their mindset about sex and setting a purpose for why they are joining bodies with someone else can be a healing experience.
Authentic Tantra® uses elemental meditation practices from Tibetan Tantra, somatic healing practices and communication to help clients transmute trauma energy and restore full awareness. You can find out more about Authentic Tantra as a modality at Authentictantra.com
What do we get wrong about sexual health education?
People often conflate personal perceptions about sex with actual sexual health education. There is a lot of information on the internet via sex blogs and social media accounts dedicated to sexuality, and sometimes it’s difficult to sift through what is fact and what is opinion.
The internet is proliferated with fear based sex education, and sometimes it seems that for every post that presents something healthy about sexuality, there are hundreds more that spread damaging messaging about sex.
Likewise, people believe that sexual health education is just about STI prevention and knowing about the genitals. Sexual health education extends into sexual identity, the nature and health of romantic and sexual relationships, pleasure, desire and arousal, mental health, physical health and a plethora of subcategories.
There is a lot to know and many ways to learn it all! But most people are only aware of the “clinical” versions of sexual health education.
Furthermore, in America, only 22 states require for their school districts to have sexual health education programs, and only 13 of those states instruct for those programs to be medically accurate. This is a major issue and the lack of comprehensive sexual health education has led to the epidemic we now face with increasing numbers in STIs, again.
We have a disparity in sexual health education across the board and as a country we have to advocate more for this to be a priority. It begins at home.
What can we do to change the way kids & adults are educated and continue to educate themselves?
Adults need to have the willingness to invest in receiving a comprehensive sex education, and the willingness to practice what they learn. Adults can invest time in doing their own research about sexuality via social media where many sex educators and Sexual Health Organizations deliver their information.
Or they could save time, and learn proper technique by investing financially to receive education from a sexpert, coach, or therapist in one-on-one sessions. Once adults are educated about sexuality, they can pass the information onto their children.
There are books and seminars on how to talk to children of all ages about sex. As children become more mature, adults should allow them to explore and learn for themselves while still guiding them to choose healthy sex practices during their experiences.
You and your husband, Na’Im, started Real Love Church. An online, interactive, non religious church. Where did the idea come from?
Love inspired us.
My husband expressed to me that he has always wanted to have his own church based around Love, and I also shared the same desire. We instantly made the decision to start a non-profit business and began Real Love Church.
You can learn more about Ministers Najieb and read summaries of some of our latest sermons on our website Reallovechurch.org.
What’s been the feedback from your congregation?
Our congregation members have been extremely blessed by our work as miracle workers.
We have seen some of our members experience dramatic shifts in their consciousness where they are now manifesting and living out the life of their dreams.
We have members that literally feel like they are missing a dose of medicine if they don’t have the weekly word. We broadcast Live on Instagram on Saturday’s at 11am eastern and on Zoom.
Our church is a spiritual community that focuses on 5 core topics: GOD, LOVE, SEX, RELATIONSHIPS, MONEY. We are helping people heal their perceptions around these topics because the misperception of these 5 things often cause major blocks in people’s lives.
What’s it like working with your husband?
Working with my husband is a dream come true. I love when he takes lead on projects and when he teaching me new things. Working with Na’Im is definitely a learning experience in patience and allowance.
I’m so used to running things on my own, and he helps me to relax into my feminine energy of more which is providing me with a healthy balance. We make a really good team and we get so much done when we work together.
What’s one challenge you face in your work that you’re still working on navigating?
The challenge is within knowing how to deal with the public in advertising what I do as a Pleasure Coach, and knowing how to reach them with the information I have for them. I love to learn and I’m always on a quest to deepen my knowledge.
The challenge is knowing how to deliver this information to the public in a way that is easily digestible and affordable. I have an app that will be launching this spring that is one of my solutions to this challenge, as well as an online tantric community for those who will be working with me using Authentic Tantra®.
Who do you go to when you’re needing support and guidance?
I turn to GOD first and foremost for guidance and support. From GOD’s guidance I then turn to my soul tribe. The tribe includes my parents, friends, husband, mentors, colleagues, my cat and even my social media family and church congregation. Everyone can help in some way.
Even the Lyft and Uber drivers that transport me from place to place have been supports and miracle workers in my life.
When was the last time you practiced self-care and why is self-care important to you?
I practice self care every day. Self-care is more than just caring for your physical body by getting massages or taking baths or treating yourself to something nice. Self-care is also checking in with self constantly.
I want to make sure that I am receiving the maximum amount of pleasure from every situation in my life. I check in on my emotions to determine what I am feeling and what I may need in the moment.. I practice being patient with myself and holding space for myself when I’m going through rough times.
It’s important to me to do these self checks and to perform self service because it enriches me as a person and helps me remain focused on my purpose of extending Love.
I can’t pour from an empty cup. Self-care is me pouring back into myself so I can show up for others.
What are your unshakable values and when did you become clear on them?
Love is my guide and the only thing I value. I became clear on that early in my life.
It’s years in the future. You’re on stage to accept an award for your life’s work. What’s your five word acceptance speech?
Grateful For God’s Divine Guidance.
Learn more about Tyomi + connect
Tyomi Morgan-Najieb is a former model-turned-sex-expert who transformed her love for writing and sex into an internationally recognized source for online sex education. Tyomi’s Youtube channel, that represents her sex blog Glamerotica101, reaches over 310,000 subscribers and is viewed by millions of people around the world who seek to improve their sex lives through her “how to” videos. The “Glamazon” has been featured on dozens of outlets including Comedy Central, BET.com, Ebony Magazine, Essence.com, NY Mag’s The CUT, Huffington Post, and The NOD Podcast. Tyomi currently serves as the Resident Sexpert for Cassiuslife.com and The Exxxotica Expo. Instagram. Twitter. Glamerotica101. Sexpert Tyomi.